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I don't remember my dreams often, though I'm sure I must dream every night. Unless I awaken in the middle of a particularly emotional scene (or one in which I need to use the bathroom) I don't remember them. I've been revising my memoir the past few months, though, and this is very difficult and sometimes emotional work. I often wake up at 3:00 or 4:00 and begin brainstorming about solving a problem in a scene or a chapter. Or I think about the feedback I got from a former instructor and editor who read my entire messy manuscript. There is still a lot of work ahead. Her most important piece of advice is to allow myself vulnerability to go deeper into the emotional scenes. That's pretty scary for someone who hates to be vulnerable. I'm okay; really I am. Couldn't be better . . . The next few months, while I dig deep into my heart to pull up all the pain, the hurt, and the fears will likely cause some nightmares. But there's no hope for it--I've got to get the story told. I've heard the best way to confront fear and shame is to name it. Well, I've got a lot of name-calling ahead of me. --Janice
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January 2022
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